I have been getting a lot of great ideas from fellow blogger Souparni about post ideas and I thought I should do this one because everyone at some point in life has been disappointed whether it was something small or something life altering. I was going to do this post particularly for students who didn’t achieve the grades they hoped to but to be honest this advice works for other disappointments too so I just wrote about it in general. Disappointments are a part of life and no one can get everything they want all the time. These are a few things I personally find helpful in dealing with disappointment:
Grieve- It’s normal to feel sad or even depressed after something disappointing has happened in your life. You just have to let the sadness run its course instead of trying to repress it. And you also need to remember that this feeling won’t last forever.
Acceptance- An important part of the process is accepting that something that you didn’t expect has happened and that unfortunately it is something disappointing. You need to accept that not everything works out perfectly and this was one of those incidences. Accepting this will allow you to move on faster.
Know yourself- You need to always remember that making mistakes or not achieving something you hope to is part of being human. The beauty of being human is that you are not perfect and that humans are constantly making mistakes every single day. Know that you can achieve anything you set your mind to and just because it didn’t happen this time doesn’t mean you should give up. It just means you have to work even harder than you did the last time. Know that you are capable of more than this.
Positivity- Sometimes it’s very hard to be positive when something disappointing has occurred in your life but you need to remember that this isn’t the end of the world. Something better is still out there waiting for you. So instead of mopping around and whining about how unfair life is do something positive because no matter how down you are it will definitely help. Go out and help the poor and remind yourself how lucky you are to have so much. Adopt an animal from a shelter and give it a new home. Listen to some positive music instead of depressing music. Read some self help books. Just basically do something to keep yourself busy and positive even if you don’t feel like it (which to be honest you probably won’t)
Smile- There is scientific evidence suggesting that the mere act of smiling can actually help a lot in changing your mood. Smiling causes an increase of the release of dopamine (the neurotransmitter in your brain that makes you happy) which makes you feel happier. So try doing something that will make you smile or better yet laugh like watching a funny movie or hanging out with friends.
Explore Your Choices- If the disappointing event has left you in a situation where you now have to rethink your future remember that even though you were looking forward to a certain future things do change. Look at this as a way of being able to readjust your plans. Maybe it just wasn’t meant to be. So instead of giving up look for new methods of achieving what you want or make new goals that you can achieve. Just remember not to give up.
Do Better- If you get a chance to redo something you should take it. For example, for people who didn’t do so well in their exams you can resit some of your papers and work harder and do better. And for other things too, if you’re able to get a second chance to do better than before, go for it.
Reassess Your Life/Goals- If there is absolutely nothing you can do than reassess your goals and try out something different. Maybe this just wasn’t meant to be for you and maybe change is a good thing. Try out new things and make some new goals.
Sometimes disappointment can get overwhelming and therapy can help get your life back on track or at least teach you how to deal properly in a healthy was with the disappointment. You feeling disappointed or down can also effect the people around you and sometimes couples therapy can help you deal with it together as a couple.
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